[english] where are you-annie2
Hey, Where are you
Dear annie
I’m wondering whether you could settle a dispute between my friend “Laura” and me. She thinks it’s rude to “ghost”-leave parties without saying bye. I think it’s fine.
For example, last weekend, our mutual friend had a barbecue. This particular friend is a social butterfly, so there were probably close to 75 people there. I knew a dozen or so of the guests. I enjoyed catching up with them and meeting some new people, but after a couple of hours, my socializing meter was about up and I was ready to go home and get to bed.
I didn’t want to take the trouble to say bye to everyone I knew there, so I just said good night to the people in my immediate vicinity and then stepped out quietly. About an hour later, Laura texted asking where I’d gone. When I told her I was already at home, she got angry and said it was rude for me not to say goodbye.
I really have never thought of it as rude. I think of it as a timesaver for everyone. I hate awkwardly interrupting the flow of conversations to tell people I’m leaving, especially because then other people usually chime in, “Oh, I should get going too,” and I feel as if I’ve killed the party. I just want to slip out quietly and let everyone else keep doing their thing.
what do you think, Annie? Is it bad manners to ghost?
- Tiptoeing Toward the Exit